Parenting Mistakes

I am not perfect! The entire world will know when I get frustrated! I am good at hiding my emotions (sometimes), but not when I get stressed +frustrated + under a lot of pressure + anxious + more pressure! And today, I lost it!!!
8:30 AM got mad at my daughter…did not find the car key, and it was right in front of me, so I drove fast! Still mad!!! I was late for work and not ready for a 9:00 AM meeting, a 10:00 AM zoom call with a client, and an 11:00 AM meeting with another client (in person).
Then, I realized that being mad at myself and my innocent daughter won’t change the world arround me! I felt soooo guilty! Being a parent is an important job, but it’s not an easy one.

Life is stressful! I desperately need a vacation… Hawaii…any free tickets out there? Hmmm…

Reddit user asked parents “What are mistakes that you feel that you made that others learn from before it is too late?”

Here are some of the most eye-opening ones from some parents:

1-“Start learning about your emotions now. Not how to control them or make them go away, but how to identify, name, acknowledge, breathe with, love, and accept them.”

“Then, learn what [your emotions] are trying to tell you about what you need and want. Life gets a load easier when you can do this. It also saves your child years of therapy. Read The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read.“

2-“A little means a lot to a young child.”

“When I was working from home and my kids wanted to go to the park, I would say no because I couldn’t take a two-hour break — until I realized that for them, a 20-minute trip to the park was just as good. They got to go, run, and play for a while, and they were happy.”

3-“Make time for your kid. Like, really make time.”

“My son is now 9, and I’m lucky to be able to give him the attention he deserves. When I was working myself to death, I was only home to sleep and get ready for work, and it affected him emotionally a lot. Now, he’s doing better with schooling, has waaaay less tantrums, is eating better, sleeping better, and just doing better overall.”

Yes, I am actually thinking of a remote job!

4-“Infant furniture and toys are ridiculously overpriced.”

“You don’t need a $200 high chair. You don’t need a $500 crib. Your don’t need a $500 nursing chair. You don’t need a $150 baby carrier. Save your money [and buy cheaper options]; spend it on a really good car seat. Don’t agonize over buying the [expensive] stroller, rocker, swing, and baby carrier. They mostly all do the same thing, and the small differences won’t be noticeable when you are using it.”

5 “Refrain from making one person be the disciplinarian and the other the consoler. Try to share the load.”

“You may fall into one category naturally, but there will be times that you want to be in the other role — and it will take time to transition out of the role you had, especially if you’ve done it a long time. This can turn into teenagers who do respect the consoler, or teenagers who can’t open up to the disciplinarian.”

6-“Familiarize yourself with the psychology of family units, trauma if you have any, and general psychology.”

“It has helped me as a parent so much. Makes navigating tough situations with your child easier when you know where they are coming from and understand your own thought process. I have stopped myself from making regretful decisions by studying psychology, and it helped me distance myself from my mother’s parenting style, which was abusive and traumatic. There were many things I didn’t realize were extremely important to DO and AVOID.”

“I think number (6) is a good advice!”

7-“If you’re going to give in, give in early.”

“For example, if your kid wants ice cream, and you say no, and they beg a little — that’s when you’d give in. If you give in once they’ve started kicking and screaming, then you’ve just taught them that’s how they get their way. I’m not saying always give in, and I’m not saying that you should in the first place. But if you change your mind or decide to give in, do it quick! Otherwise, follow through and keep it at no.”

Again, parenting is not a competition, do not compare yourself to others. Parents, you are doing a fantastic job! If you are doing your best, you rock it!